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Best sung in a Johnny Cash voice, as are most things.

The Little Scrummer Boy

Scrum they told me, pa rum pum pum scrum
What do your blockers be, pa rum pum pum scrum
Our finest stories we Plan, pa rum pum pum scrum
To lay before the Man, pa rum pum pum scrum,
Rum pum pum scrum, rum pum pum scrum,

We stand ’cause we don’t sit, pa rum pum pum scrum,
… When we scrum.

Dear Scrum Master, pa rum pum pum scrum
I am a Hacker too, pa rum pum pum scrum
We meet all we can, pa rum pum pum scrum
Staring at the ceiling fan, pa rum pum pum scrum,
rum pum pum scrum, rum pum pum scrum,

Shall I estimate points for you, pa rum pum pum — done,
When we scrum.

The PM nodded, pa rum pum pum scrum
The pig and chicken kept time, pa rum pum pum scrum
I planned my story for him, pa rum pum pum scrum
I burned down my task for him, pa rum pum pum — done,
rum pum pum scrum, rum pum pum scrum

Then he* smiled at me, pa rum pum pum pum
Tomorrow we scrum.

* = he being Ken, hence lowercase, and non-Almighty. Capital “He” uses military-grade specs and gets it right the first time with minimal QA, but occasionally easter eggs like the Platypus do slip through